7 Weeks Ago

It has been 7 weeks, since we laid our baby boy to rest. Lowering his tiny casket into the ground, was one of the hardest things I have ever done. Before he passed away, I got to hold him in my arms. They were ventilating him and said they would keep breathing for him as long as I wanted if I wanted to hold him for a while. But I didn't want him to suffer. As soon as Nathan and I got him in our arms I told them to stop, and I told my baby Hank that it was ok....that he could go and be with Jesus. That was hard.....so so hard. But somehow giving up his little body was even harder. At least after we let his spirit go we had his sweet little body to hold and kiss and touch. After we buried him, there was just nothing left. Nothing but the memories that I hold on to so tightly. I try so hard to hold on to them because there are so few. There should have been a lifetime of them......